There is No Box!
What you think is possible in your life is based on what you currently believe.
What you believe is based on who you think you are.
Who you think you are is based on what others tell you, you are.
Who are the others?
Society, media, social media, family, parents, teachers, friends, strangers.
Society is quick to label everything and everyone and put it into a box. From the time you are born, you’ve been put in a box depending on your race, economic status, geographical location, etc., the list goes on. The box that society puts you in will dictate how people interact with you and treat you. The worst part is that most often this box will dictate how you live your life.
Some boxes can be so harsh and controlling that they cost people their lives, their dreams, relationships, careers, family, again, the list goes on.
Before too long the box that society has put you in
*becomes your identity
*starts dictating your life
*determines and confirms who you are and what you do
*changes your mindset
*lowers your self-confidence
*keeps you from playing full out
*keeps you from creating a life that means something to you on your terms
Millennials are a perfect example. Society has labeled them as being entitled and lazy. Everyone has picked this up and continues to use it to define that generation. As a coach who works with millennial women, I see first-hand how this box cripples this generation from being who they really are.
I believe it is wrong to reduce an individual to a simple quality or two, to put them into a box that has been defined by others. It takes away their rights to choose who they are and what they want to be.
What if I told you that you shouldn’t be labeled or put into a box because There is No Box?
The box that you are in is the one you've allowed society to create for you. When you don’t know who you are or what you want than society and other people fill in the gaps for you. This becomes your box.
What would happen if you knew who you were? Who your authentic self was and what your authentic self truly wanted out of life?
It takes work. It takes a lot of work and a willingness to go deep to discover your true self rather than allow others to dictate that for you.
Brene Brown defines authenticity as “the daily practice of letting go of who we think we’re supposed to be and embracing who we are.”
It is hard to embrace who you are if you don’t know who you are. Here are some questions to get you started:
1) What are your 5 most important values in your life? Define what they mean to you.
2) How would you describe the attributes you like most about yourself?
3) What do other people admire most about you and what is the impact you have on them?
4) What core beliefs about life serve you best?
5) What makes you unique?
6) What makes you feel most passionate, most satisfied, most fulfilled?
7) If you had to name one feeling that you would like to have most often, what would it be?
Words of Encouragement
Practicing being authentic is challenging. It can feel daunting and risky as you put your true self out there for the world to see (Brown, 2010). Some people may not like your authentic self. That’s okay. Remember, there is no box!
Don’t let society dictate how your story turns out. When you begin to embrace your authentic self you can start taking the steps to create a life that means something to you on your terms.
There is No Box! There’s only one if you let people put you in!
“To be nobody-but-yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody but yourself-means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight-and never stop fighting.” E. E. Cummings
Take an hour to do a deep assessment of yourself and think about the following:
1) Where in your life do you feel you can’t be real, honest, and open. Write it down.
2) In what situations and what people do you feel you have to be fake with? Write it down.
3) What about those situations and/or people makes you feel that you have to be fake? Write it down.
4) What will happen in these situations and with these people if you become more authentic?
5) How would it make you feel to show up more authentically?
6) How would that change your life?
7) What is one small step you can take this week to start showing up more authentically in your life?
Helping clients get to the core of who she is and what she wants so she can create a life that means something to her on her terms is what I do. If you are ready to discover your authentic self and embrace who you really are and you need someone to help you connect with me so we can talk.
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Make today amazing!